Just a post

Yesterday, I came across this DVD, How to lose friends and alienate people. I would be lying if I say I really wanted to see it's content except for Megan Fox. Ohh! What a beauty she is! Oh my my!
So it starts like any other movie and ends like one, a loser becomes a hero, gets the girl, gets the life he always dreamed of, et all. Yet there are a few things I would like to make a note of. Kristen Dunst looks beautiful(considering I've never found her pretty) and plays her part very well. Jeff Bridges is wonderful playing the boss who is running the business for the sake of running it. And the protagonist Sidney Young, who always gets into problems because of his never-wait-for-tomorrow attitude, is brilliantly played by a Paul Scholes look-a-like Simon Pegg.
It has one or two nice quotes, one of which is, My glory walks hand in hand with my doom! which of course is taken from the epic Troy. Such was my likeness with this quote that I memorized it once I heard it.
I think I've fondness for the romantic comedies, be it One Fine Day, Heartbreak Kid or anything, I sort of like them. They make a great watch even when you are in deep-shit! That's what I like about romantic comedies.
One thing that always strikes my mind while watching these pretty ladies acting, is; beauty is inversely proportional to the degree of acting skills one possesses, which, of course has one exception; Catherine Zeta Jones. :)
When I was small I had this plan to go on a quest to find CZJ and marry her! :)
You think that's weird? Then see this.
Considering what these GenX kids plan to do, my plan was quite sane for the kid of that age! Don't you agree?

Picture courtesy: http://www.imdb.com/

Similarity....

One of my friends forwarded me a mail with a chain of Dilbert specials. This(in my opinion) was the best, matching my office life frame-by-frame. I felt, as if Dilbert's creator knows me! :P
On the other hand, I think I'm losing my originality! :(
Anyways, you lot enjoy the post!


Click on the image to enlarge it!

One weird thought

Have you ever woken up in the morning with one of your body parts hurting? You know you didn't stress it yesterday, yet it's sore and hurting! Well, I too have such mornings, not frequent but still I come across such mornings. I don't know what you think about your sore body part, but I like to think them as an act of other side of my personality! Yes, I wish I had MPD(Multiple Personality Disorder) :). He would be, everything I'm not. He could do everything that I can't. And he could do anything that I can't or couldn't when I should have. His name would be, ummmm, one heck of the name, hearing which my foes would tremble with fear. :P His name would be Aakrosh, wow! what a name! (Aakrosh's crude english translation would be Wrath).
So, my everyday's altercations would be extended and then made even-steven by Aakrosh, especially those where I would be on the receiving end, and those where I had to show the decency. Life would be simple for me, as Aakrosh would do everything I wish to have done, he would be my savior, my problem-eradicator. So it feels good when I think the soreness in the mornings is the result of my other half going out and levelling my unfinshed altercation. And it gives me immense satisfaction and confidence when I meet that person next time.
I told you all the good effects about MPD, now think about this. What if Aakrosh would do some horrendous mistake, say, kill somebody while equating my terms? You can't say he can't, cause I already told you he is a pile of arrogance, raw anger. So that would be bad, really bad!!!
In the end, moral of the story is, it's good to think about your other self when you have sore and hurt body in the mornings, but don't rear the idea of having one such Aakrosh in real, it may bite you in your backside before you know!
(One parting thought: I wonder how it would really feel to be the one affected with an MPD!!!)

PS: The idea to write this post was shamelessly picked up from some other creative work, yet I've tried spice up things all by my imagination and experiences.

My abnormalities

After years of sporadic introspections, I have come to know, well, I have several abnormalities... :)
And I must say I have never tried to normalize them, for they've bailed me out of several dire circumstances and desperate situations. So these abnormalities have been blessing in disguise. You too might find several similarities, read on:

1. The sense of direction : This might be because of my ethnicity, I'm not sure. I feel this is because the way I learned to recognize directions. As I come from hills, all that I learned about directions was either up or down. :) Quite comical, but this is how it is. In hills, when you give directions to a certain location, either it has to be up or down from your relative position, and each place has it's own signature, that is, no two places are identical. So it easier for a person to have the picture of the direction to a place once he reaches. But in cities, woah! I find everything similar, I can't make much difference out of them. Now, here something comes handy when I travel, advertisement hoardings and shops' title boards. After staying so many years in cities, still I use this trick to track down the route to a given destination. But the problem arises when the hoarding changes or the shops' title boards are written in the language I can't read!

2. Left or right : I can't make out which side is left and which is right, the way people do. I have to think for a while, and then I conceive the idea of left and right. Sometimes(especially while in autoricksaws), by the time I sense which is left and which is right, the vehicle passes the given diversion. :)
So now a days, I've come point my hands towards the direction I need to go, don't think about left or right, sounds pretty crude, but serves my purpose!

3. Dreamless : This could be funny to those people who dream even during the days... :)
For me dreams are like oasis, a year has 365 days and I dream may be 5 to 6 times in a whole year. How I long to dream not to be mentioned here dreams, how I long to dream those wonderful, success story dreams.
The funny part is, I had to make up stories when I was in primary school, every friend of mine used to have a dream to tell, and I use to fake a dream!! Hardest part comes when my loved one says, she had seen me in dreams! Now what the hell should I say? If I say I don't dream, I might be tagged with a heartless adjective, and if I say even I had seen her in my dreams, it's an outright lie. I wont write here what I do in such situation. :)
P.S : I sleep like a hog. :)

4. Photographic memory : Lots of people find this abnormality similar to theirs, but I have twist in the tale. For me it's easier to remember what I read, what I hear, word by word. Sometimes my radar picks up the conversations not related to me in remotest sense and still makes me remember. I used to see the entire book, word by word(well, not exactly), during my examination. :)
But with this privilege, comes a disadvantage, I forget things quickly, and pretty quickly. Good part is I still remember the essence/gist of what a particular sentence meant.

So far they have helped me in some way or other. So I would conclude it's better to have abnormalities if you use them in good effect.

Couldn't think of a good title

I've completely lost the track of the time now a days. The change in project, my evil intention, my hard-work to see my evil intention get through, IPL and Champion's League... all sums up to one sentence, I really have lost the track, or rather, I'm running in a different lane!
Different late-night ToI sessions have drained me. Moving and start working immediately into a new project hasn't helped much. Feels like I've become the epitome of a cheap-labor, or you can say a synonym for Big Bazaar(remember their punchline? "Is se sasta aur achcha kaha milega?"). How dearly I wish my evil intentions to be true soon, sadly that hasn't happened till date. So I'm still trying.
And there's Champions' League and IPL. In second semi-final's second leg between, Chelsea and Liverpool, Chelsea got through after a 4 - 3 aggregate. They were deadlocked in the first leg at Anfield(Liverpool's home) 1 - 1, courtesy Jon Arnie Riise's own goal in the dying seconds of the match. It was always goign to be a herculean task for (my favorites) Liverpool to register a win at Stamford Bridge(Chelsea's home ground). And my fear become true as Drogba muscled in, tearing the Liverpool defence to hit nets twice. It was a well fought battle, and scoreline read 3 - 2 after 120 minutes of play, as 90 minutes of play couldn't decide the better team. Babel's goal from near-centre was a treat to watch, but as commentator said, it came a bit late. Finally it'll be Chelsea Vs Manchester United in all English European League final at Moscow.
Enough of Europe, coming back to India, now a days there's a craze called IPL prevalent in Indian heat, spreading like wildfire, catching everybody's attention. The strongest teams, Chennai Super Kings and Kolkata Knight Riders have bitten the dust, after successive losses. Team Chennai is clearly showing how Australians had dominated the initial part of this inaugural IPL edision. I guess Dhoni must be finding it hard to pull back his teams act together, but still he has to do it, and do it faster.
Controversy looming around the captain's head, Kolkata Knight Riders too are well below their standards. Frankly, has Sourav Ganguly ever shied away from controversy? I think he isn't an apt leader for T20s, hasn't led from front and this is showing in the group-standings. Now that Shoaib Akthar has been cleared to play, it may boost their morale.
Rajasthan Royals have always brought something new to IPL everytime, latest being Asnodkar, looking him play, one surely agree : Dynamites indeed come in small packages. What a man, I'm impressed, though not very much refined and may fall against quality pace attack, yet a talent worth your money! They are looking very good side, after Smith's arrival, their top-order has gained more ground. And Sohail Tanvir is troubling the batsmen like never before, I'm sure Parthiv Patel, didn't see the ball coming, I can bet on that.
Okie then, Bangalore Royal Challengers Vs King XI Punjab is on the cards today, I seriously want Bangalore to win this one.

o'reilly a book???

Have you ever come across a book which doesn't make you feel like you are reading a book? :) I guess I confused you, let me rephrase it, have you read a (text)book(a programming language cookbook) which is humorous and grasping, page-turner(that's what they call good novel, isn't it?) ?
Well I came across one quite unexpectedly. This was a book in C++, Practical C++ Programming, Second Edition, by Steve Oualline. Wow what a book, I'll say a double-wow for the people who are really into novels. Folks I recommend you this one, grab it and you wont regret. You benefit two-fold at the cost of one, you get to learn C++ and that too in a novel(noble?) way.
Ohgosh! What am I doing! Why am I praising this book, shouldn't I be showering my praise to it's author, Steve Oualline? Wow! he's the man, I mean the way he has put C++ in that book, yeah! thumps up!
I bumped into it accidentally. I wanted to brush up my C++ skills so I went to library for C++ Primer by Stanley B. Lippman, Josée Lajoie, Barbara E. Moo, and this book caught my concentration. I must say it attracted me by it's looks at first :) everybody does (attract by looks), everybody is (attracted by looks)! So I checked the contents, read a few topic which I've out an out knowledge about, found it okie to resume things.
The way author has put down his thoughts, various historical facts and habits of programmers, it's nice. That's why I liked this book. A very good book for beginners, as they'll enjoy the reading.
Last point, it's good for beginning and good for brushing up C++, as this book doesn't cover more deeply seated culprits of C++. Nevertheless, it's a good book, go grab it!

Cartwheeling Feelings

Starry night, a lonely by-lane, dimly lit street lights almost about to extinguish, a dog howls at a distance. Several other follow the proceedings, as if they are communicating. I guess they must be telling their tales of the day which now has matured into a cold, dark and silent night. I've to reach the destination, I pull my jacket more closer to my body and start walking in a uniform motion, almost mechanical. I've been walking for long, how long?! I've no track of time, as my automatic watch has stopped functioning, it shows forty-three past six. Yes, exactly the time I had started this long walk. But one thing I know, when I started it was still evening, the sun had just gone past the horizon and night was approaching with its black cloak on. I want to reach the destination, meet my friends who are waiting for me as we've planned a get-together today.
So here I'm, walking alone. A thought crosses my mind, what if I don't make it on time, what if they have already left. I increase my speed, now the feet start moving faster, but the movement is same, machine-like. I don't care! I just have to reach there on time, my long lost crush must be waiting for me, I'm sure she will be. Ah! how can I forget her! Her beautiful face that used to lit me up, her sweet voice that used to soothe my wildest of feelings. How can I forget how her arrival in my life had changed its course. This feeling makes me lighter as fatigues vanishes and I move swifter.
I've just crossed a four-way crossing, a pack of dogs come towards me, I stop fearing they would attack me. They look vicious, and I'm sure they are vicious after the day's humiliation they go through from so called the humans, us. One of them, leading the pack, halts just in front of me, looks at me as if I was the one they were searching for. I'm afraid and want to run away, but something tells me not to, so I stand defensively and I look into its eyes. We are almost about to clash, a fight imminent. But suddenly these strays run away growling and howling, I sense a fear in their howls. I'm surprised how? My mind questions, and I've no answer. But the moment I raise my eyes, I find the answer. A man, mid-forties, is coming from the opposite side. I feel a shy of relief as I was dying to talk to someone after so much of silent walking. So I ask him: "Excuse me, what's the time?" He retorts "ten-thirty" without bothering to look at me, he passes by, a strong synthesized alcoholic smell makes me uncomfortable. But then I have to reach my destination, so I start my synchronized walk again.
After walking for another half-an-hour, I'm able to see my destination. Hell! this is on secluded place. Why did my friends choose this place for get-together? I curse them, couldn't they have chosen a bit accessible place! The road has street-lamps, standing silently, just for the sake of it. A few people standing here and there. I feel strange, they didn't notice me when I passed by them. But I'm in too much of hurry to stop and think over it. My long lost crush is waiting for me, I have to reach there, and on time. I reach the place, the door is unbolted, I slowly push the door, peek inside. Deadly silence! In one corner of the room, all of my friends are gathered around, in a huddle and are staring at something, lying between them. To see it for myself, I move closer to the huddle, I'm about to peek in, I hear a shrill sound of police siren. I becomes louder as the vehicle approaches nearer. I could see it through the open door through which I'd just sneaked in. Now this sound is so, loud, as if it would tear open my ear-drums. I press my hands against my ears, close my eyes and fall down, unable to withstand the sound.
And there was brightness, as white as it could be and everything was gone, I was flat on my back, my alarm clock ringing like an enraged animal. I switched it off and went to loo, to start another of those boring routine days.

An unconventional source of entertainment

As promised in one my previous posts, I'm here with few gossips that relates me to our very own news channels. To start things off, I present you a trivia about myself, I used to hate news channels, dint like them at all, but after I started watching AajTak and Headlines Today, now a days, the first thing I do after I reach home is tune in to one of these news channels. For all those who watch the soaps and serials, I would recommend these two channels, for they provide you equal amount of emotions and drama, in addition to the usual news. So don't you think it's an advantage, one channel providing you your daily dose of emotions and news at a go? Here's how;
I don't have to explain that they provide you the daily dose of news, they are the news channels.
Now about the best part, the emotions overflow, ooze out while watching this channels, there are usual suspense, drama, action, everything that your favorite series provides. I'll present here the live examples which has brought best of the emotions in me.
Think about this headline: "Amitabh Bachchan ko thand lagi!"(Amitabh caught cold!), now, what the f***ing news is that? And visualize this line at the lower end of screen, flashing continuously!! Seriously man, people are f***ing dying on the border, thousands of people are suffering from much more acute diseases, and what they are covering is whether Amitabh caught cold or not! My a**;
And there's this one, the coverage on "The Great Khali". I myself being an avid follower of WWE for many years, I know it's all planned, synchronized, scripted way of fighting. For God's sake, that's why they call it World Wrestling Entertainment, damn it! Do I need to tell them what WWE's E stands for? Khali lost the match to this, lost another match to that. I wonder, a giant of 7'3", losing a match to an opponent much more weaker(physically) than him. And that too, they dedicate a huge slot for this so called giant's news and cover absolutely everything about what he does, what he eats. If given a chance they'll prepare a report on how Khali's shit looks like!
And there's The Grand Stand, which talks about the bollywood, I dont know whether it offers the news outside bollywood. This lady who anchors this show, my god, can't she act normal??? Even if she's like that in her real life, can't she act like human just for the span of that show??? She could be a great asset to the doctors who study or are researching on human facial muscles. Looking at her, I feel like... puking in her face. Wait, there's more to it, her voice modulates with the expression in her face, shit! wonder where they get these people!
They don't show the news, they first do an autopsy on the news, put as much spice as they can, and present them... I wonder what's wrong in showing the news as it is. They try to reach to the base of the news, it's cause... especially if it's related to cricket, then forget about the depth they'll dive in to get those facts and cause. Well well well guys(news channel guys :) ), that's not for you to investigate, we have CID, CBI and other federal agencies to do that! Somebody please tell them so.
Anyways, they serve dual purpose for me at least, news and entertainment! Wow! that's great considering a news channel. Thank you guys for helping me focus on news again!

Reality that weighs you down

I came face to face with my moment of truth, yesterday! The information was crystal clear, written all over, in front of me....
I don't know whether I should be cautious, happy?!, sad, alarmed... I don't know how to embrace this situation. I had always known this was inevitable with the daily schedule I go through, but this soon? I hadn't even imagined.
Yes sir/ma'am, I gained, but I guess gain isn't always synonymous with profit, or for that matter benefit. Without further suspense, I, here, announce that I stepped from over-weight to obese zone. :) I was astonished to see my process of rapid progress, the journey from 73 Kilograms to 81.1 was in fact a very short one, hardly of 3 months, and increased frequency of junk food, mini-meals per day colossally helped the cause. And now I've become the thing(remember Fantastic four??? :) ), nemesis for weighing machines. It all started with the tummy problems, and to counter the upset-stomach I started grubbing several times a day, feeding myself with the junk food. And today morning, when I faced myself(in the mirror), I thought someone was looking at me, someone obese, someone who had just been pumped with air all over. So, now time for me to do a round up, a physical introspection, for if it is not restrained I have a feeling I'll blow myself up... :)
The were times when I used to hold a cup of water in my each collarbone, and now hehe... let's not divulge the secrets.
I accelerated upwards like the rocket, now I need to descend decently, for I know the rapid descend is the possible symptom for incurable disease.
So anybody with fool-proof idea can post the comment(s), because I desperately want to be an overweight again! :)

a visit, reunion, a performer, the traffic et all

My uncle and his family's long awaited visit to our place has finally turned into reality. And it has made a kinda reunion here, at least for me. From the day they(my uncle and his family) landed here I've deserted my previous house and shifted at my cousin's place. So it's kinda picnic for me, and of course, I came across, a lot of new experiences which I'll hereby narrate :) ...
First thing I came across is it takes 95 bucks to reach Majestic railway station from my place. And came to know that the traffic is not the only nuisance in the city; there are "autowallahs". The more I try to befriend them, more they try to cheat me.... Reached railway station half-dead, criss-crossing the traffic with myriad vehicles and the fare-meter read 93, but I dint get my change back from this so called auto-driver after I handed him bill of 100, and wen asked about the return, he simply said "No Change". Felt like hitting one "sucker-punch" in his face. After baptizing him with choicest of swear words, I entered inside the station.(Swear words were in my mother-tongue so I'm sure he must have thought them as substitution for a thank you and must have wondered how long, multi-syllable a thank you in my mother-tongue is! As he rode away smiling, I thought whether he really thought a "Thank you" can be that long, or was it because of the extra 7 bucks he earned....???? well... god knows)
Met uncles inside and came back with them in a hired cab, destination; cousin's place. When we had finished with our dinner, the day had grown old enough to take us to bed.
The next day; now the actual adventure starts, navigating the bangalore traffic in a two wheeler. No no, it's not me who does the navigation, it's my traffic-dexterous friend, Ashu, who gives me a pillion ride, and I get ample time for the observation.
It exactly takes 30 mins to reach office from home, whatever route we take, it's always the same, 30 mins. And these 30 minutes.. ummm... makes me feel like I'm a performer, though nobody watches us performing and it's not something like I'm live on some TV, but still the way we overtake and by-pass the plethora of human-carrying machines on a black labyrinth of bangalore's road-way, it really surges the adrenaline to rush across every single cell of my body. The way bus-drivers drive, sometimes I feel like they are the highest road-tax payers, and as if they own the road. And I cannot stop comparing the autos(autowallahs included) with the monkeys, yes you read it correct, monkeys. Their indifference, the way they trouble a person who is late for work by asking double the actual charge, the way they drive, everything reminds me of monkeys. Sometimes I find them sadistic, especially when it rains. When it does(rains) most of them wont ask where one wants to go, they will stop the auto near you, but wont ask you where you want to go, instead, they'll simply stop it there and wait, wait for you to ask them... and when you do, they wont say "double" or some exorbitant amount of money, they'll simply say "no", a firm no. I wonder what kinda pleasure they get, seeing others suffer....!!!
oh I drifted away from the main topic.... the performer... so I was saying I feel like a performer when I get a pillion ride... many two wheeler riders WILL laugh at me and my haughtiness but this is just my way of interpreting things, one of the beautiful things that this city has to offer. The skills my rider, Ashu has, I sure feel like I'm in safe hands(legs included, otherwise who'll change gears... :) ) The way he manipulates the tiny spaces between two four-wheelers, the shortest and less congested path from point A to point B, you ask it and he knows it all, and I like that, really like that. I'm sure most of you have seen a tight-rope walker walking across on the rope. When he does that he's very careful, every moment, every second. A small mistake can cost him worth lot more than the pain.... so, alert all the time... my friend here too, is as alert as a tight-rope walker, and add the skill of smooth-riding in bangalore's traffic, wow!!! One hell of a rider. And we perform at bangalore traffic during the mornings and evenings, weekdays. Death defying manoeuvres between the four-wheelers, whizzing past a slower vehicle, navigating the shorter but tiny "gully's", managing the 4-way intersections and passing through them, you name it and we do it all.
My days are still being spent at cousin's place, I still perform in the bangalore traffic everyday, sans Saturdays and Sundays. Come ride along with me and be a performer... cheers...

Chak de India!!!

The date was 23rd September '07. It was quarter past one in the early morning and I was still awake, feelin jubilent, in a festive mood, ready to throw a biiig bash. Only if somebody had been accompanyin me here this late, only if somebody had witnessed what I had, only if someone had felt the same surge of adrenaline that I had felt that time...
Seemed my feelings got wasted just because I dint find an accomplice to rejoice what I'd just watched with my pair of watery, blood0shed eyes(not the aftereffect of boozin but due to stayin awake late..).
I know I cant put my name there on the top with all those maniacs who live by and die for a madness called Cricket, but as far as my enthusiasm for the game is concerned, I'm sure I do fit in somewhere down there in the middle, and I'm dead sure about it.
India pulled off an incredible win against Australia, so called cricketing invincible of modern era. They have monopolized cricket the way brazil have done to the football, Micheal Schumacher had done to the F1. And yet, this happened. Man, it was really worth staying this late. And for us, the Indians... Yes I'm an indian this feeling of Indian-ness, this patriotism was instilled by a movie that I dared to watch yesterday, Chak de india.... I f u haven't seen it, I recommend you to do it as soon as possible. Oh ! And one thing, once my good fren' had tried to enlighten me, sayin movies can be inspirational, they can motivate you. I had rubbished him sayin movies are for fun, for enjoyment, they are monotony-breaker, I had argued, and the very film which was the center of argument was 'Rang De Basanti' Hey boy, now I gotcha, you were correct about the inspiration injectin movies, but still I find it difficult to squeeze out the inspiration out of the movie you had mentioned. May be this has got to do with the universal truth that each human being is unique, so what you found inspirational dint click or for that matter lacked the edge to disturb my deep-seated, undisturbed neurones... :)
Oh gosh! I ran too far out of the track. Okie, so where were we? Ah yes! the cricket that I had just witnessed was one of the best wins that India had registered against the mighty Ozs. And I as an Indian, am proud to be the part of this wonderful occasion. For the people of the country where cricket is a religion, this is a proud moment, but I hear no firecrackers burstin, may be people have lost faith after the world-cup debacle. But for me, this was the reinstatement of the faith, the trust and most importantly the keenness and the interest in the game. I hope, the religion, now again, will find it's way to the followers' heart, after all, the phoenix has started to rise from the ashes. Chak De India!