16 February 2009

The spam story

Disclaimer: This piece is the recollection of one of my distant memories, so it may not be exact, Though it is a real life incident, resemblance to any of you may be highly possible!

Back in the days, when hotmail, yahoo had just hit our senses, I was a naive internet dilettante. I used to create email accounts like a maniac. I had at least three accounts in hotmail, five accounts in yahoo and two accounts in rediff(if you had more than that, then you a bigger maniac, you unsocial psychopath!).
One fine day, I received a mail from some Ms. X(let's call her Ms.X as I don't remember her name and you don't need to know either). So I received this letter from this Ms. X, asking to move a huge sum of money she was about to inherit from the massacred parents. She had written that she had barely become eligible for marriage and she would inherit all the so called "huge sum of fortune" only if she got married. Her simple request was, I had to finance her flight tickets from some distant African country to my country and marry her and she would share a part of her fortune with me and go her own way.
The deal sounded so inviting. But the problem was, I was still underage to get married and I didn't have the money to buy her the tickets. Though I dearly wanted to be her knight in shining armour, I had to give up this thought for reasons mentioned above. That time, I had cursed my limited pocket money and I had cursed myself for losing a beautiful wife with truckload of money!(why beautiful? you should have read her letter, moron!)
So I gave up this idea to rescue this lady, but I was really lucky for I had another opportunity of rescuing another damsel in distress. But yet again I was left cursing my fate for the same aforementioned two reasons.
Days passed and those ladies with deep pockets slipped into oblivion, one day while talking with my friend(who of course was a bigger internet freak than me) I told him about the ladies and their stories. He laughed and said, "you a**$%&e, they all are fake, they just try to trick you to send money for the flight tickets and then... kiss your money goodbye! It is called spam!"
I became a spam wiser that day onwards and however sympathetic their mail be, they can't trick me because I don't give a rat's ass to such spams these days.
But you know what? Now a days they are trying to sell me lotteries, replica watches, viagra and some kinda of "manhood enhancing" medicines! As if I need them ;)

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